The church we attend hosted a conference this weekend called Sacred Marriage Conference. Gary Thomas spoke in three sessions about the heart of marriage. One of the goals on my 26 before 26 post was for us to attend a marriage conference. We had just celebrated our first anniversary when I made the list of goals and I figured it couldn’t hurt! Then our church hosted this great event! Coincidence?
I promised y’all I’d blog about each item we complete on my list. If our marriage will last longer than anything else in our life, maybe we should invest some more time learning more about marriage and each other. (Check out my 26 before 26 post here.)
Our wedding was wonderful, but our marriage is even better. However, it is not perfect. Far from it actually. One of my pet peeves is when people put on a show of acting like their marriage is perfect.
It was really encouraging to hear this: If your marriage is difficult, it doesn’t mean you are in the wrong marriage. It means your spouse is still alive.
The speaker, Gary Thomas, was funny and poignant as well as powerful. He stressed that it was not a “how-to” conference but a “heart to” conference. The focus was on preserving your heart so that in 40 years+ we care as much about our marriage as we did day 1.
Some of my favorite points:
A good marriage is not something you find. It’s something you MAKE.
We ask more of our marriages than previous generations did. We expect more of our marriage than God even intended.
Don’t treat your spouse based on the last 24-48 hours. God is more powerful than our sin.
Don’t start treating each other with a lack of patience and kindness.
Marriage is not like the metaphor of watering a tree. Marriage is like building a brick house- laying a foundation, continually building and patching. Don’t just be teammates in a set of tasks. Build your marriage. Build intimacy.
What spoke to me the most:
Don’t evaluate how you are being loved. noticed. appreciated. Evaluate how you can love better.
Let God love your spouse through you.
Have you been to a marriage conference before? What do you feel the hardest part about marriage is?